She was a cutter before people knew what it was, but this is not a tomb full of self-pity. Rather, it is a captivating view of the mental health system. Interspersed throughout the book are excerpts from her medical records, her own diaries, and her correspondence with friends. It depicts a reality where the best coping mechanism was unreality, to disappear, become wallpaper, be someone else. And if necessary, to numb reality with a dancing madness or hurting oneself. And most importantly, to always take all the blame.
It makes no difference how twisted it may seem in the eyes of others, but to you it is the obvious, uncompromised reality that a six-month-old baby seduced her daddy, that a two-year-old girl should have stopped what happened, and that a nine-year-old should have told it all. All this that makes you ill in every corner of your soul and body, it must have been something you yourself wanted. Yes, that must be the case.
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